Pick your path to Wiki Adventure!
From Infictive
(Redirected from Pick your path to Hyperwiki adventure)
I. Broke Down on the Road to Infictive
In the summit of a unbearably hot summer things just keep getting fucked up. On your way home from work yesterday your car sputtered and ran out of gas. You coasted off the road and your car joined the ever growing line of abandoned vehicles. People could no longer afford the fifteen dollar a gallon prices. It seems the choices are slim now. You can no longer afford to drive and eat. Hell , even if you didn't eat you still couldn't afford to drive. So...
What do you do?
- 1 If you walk to work
- 2 If you attempt to join Oil for the Loyal
- 3 If you hitch-hike
- 4 If you call in sick instead
- 5 If you seek shelter from the heat in a nearby store
- 6 If you call the cops for help
- 7 If you take up a life of stealing and hustling to pay for your gas
- 8 If you just wait in your car for the gas fairy to show up
- 9 If you go to the first house you see and just take the place over for yourself
- 10 If you pray to Jesus to save this sad sad world
- 11 If you kick and otherwise damage your car in a rage
- 12 If you stand beside the road with a will work for gas sign
- 13 If you Rage against the machine
- 14 If you attempt to join the band Black Circle
- 15 If you sit like Buddha in the center of the road
- 16 If you head over to the library to start a website called My penis.com
- 17 If you attempt to invent a different fuel supply
- 18 If you walk to the west side of the forest
- 19 If you get that tuna fish and cult spread sandwich out of your cooler and eat it
- 20 If you hang out in your starved car and play Kyle Deerbone CD's until your battery dies
- 21 If you desire a glimpse of a blue light special future
- 22 If you attempt in invoke the meth Demon
- 23 If you befriend the dollar bills
- 24 If you attempt to create a new flavour of Bottles of Food
- 25 If you join The Leaf of the Mason, a branch of the SOSM
- 26 If you begin doing research on the Great Alarm
- 27 If you get involved with the Uglavarian activist movement Bulbs Not Bombs
- 28 If the nesting and mating instinct takes over
- 29 If you go to the library and sign on as a member of frequency 23
- 30 If you give up all your material possessions to study Dildo Mask battle meta-martial arts
II. Later Days in Infictive
- 1 A government agent e-mails your site
- 2 If you are placed on a pirate ship
- 3 If you transported to ancient rome
- 4 You win a Strayhound bus ride to Bubbling Vomit Land
- 5 If you get a job at the airport and clean up your drug use
- 6 When you realize you can't smoke weed in Uglavaria you decide to retire to Lake Crump.
- 7 A hick up in the reality mainframe makes you a Mollkin
- 8 If you go to the local arcade and bet the rest of your life savings
- 9 Move to Santa Magic Village to start a band
- 10 You go into hiding in Ketjack
- 11 You are hired on a rich persons yaught trip as a gopher
- 12 If you are thrown into a massive zombie outbreak
- 13 If you use your free billiard skills that your dad paid for
- 14 Wik your Path to adventure
- 15 You are the Soda Man
- 16 If you are a Questing Knight
- 17 A long prison term for you
- 18 Theres no place like...home
- 19 You become a martial arts knight, a member of The Cougar's Paw
- 20 You tremble in a bloody hell
- 21 If you construct your own boat to get in Uglavaria in
- 22 Are they...Dead?
- 23 You try out stand up comedy
- 24 If you are now Andrew McFing
- 25 Its lunch time in your new reality
- 26 You become a painter
- 27 If you start disguising yourself as a mall security person
- 28 [[Then things get better]]
- 29 If you get with the local Italian mafia
- 30 If you go to the downstairs "Forbidden Books" section
III. The Short and Special Paths
- 1 You get into movies
- 2 You work in a manufacturing factory outside a colonial city 5 hours a day
- 3 New reincarnation
- 4 If you drive over to the nearby church
- 5 If the gas fairy sends you into a porno world
- 6 If you get with your buddy and start out selling just enough weed
- 7 You start a group called the Sisterhood of Man
- 8 Form a hate group for the love of Jesus
- 9 If you do experiments on animals for kicks
- 10 If you are biten by a werewolf
- 11 You shoot a movie
- 12 There is a zombie outbreak in our city
- 13 You are in the band Red Mullet Traid
- 14 You are Fexton Huffle
- 15 If you are on the shores of the newest American state, Washington A C.
- 16 You and Pickman quit Miskatonic university and go back to Santa Magic Village to join they're government funded Orchestra
- 17 Maggie ends up in a womens prison
- 18 More of that Preformance art O K?
- 19 If you go to the Viking Faire restaurant
- 20 From here the world becomes just sounds to you
- 21 You are a wandering drifter
- 22 You flux in reality traps you in Mystery X's dreamscape
- 23 If you end up in a ecological disaster
- 24 You now are a insane killer
- 25 Here's your new world
- 26 Its lunch time in your new reality
- 27 If you end up on a dinosaur planet
- 28 If you are on the shores of the newest American state, Washington A C.
- 29 So you never really make it to Wonderland
- 30 An American Civil war
IV. The Über Short and Obscure Paths
- 1 You become a police man
- 2 You become a writer
- 3 Prison Break
- 4 You are only avant garde composer in Washington A C
- 5 You find out about the A C Mafia
- 6 Lots of U F O sightings lately
- 7 Dead hands pound the door
- 8 You come back as Pony Rose
- 9 Take all your drugs and cross on over
- 10 If you become,a actor
- 11 If you jab the bouncer in the throat
- 12 So you never really make it to Wonderland
- 13 Pick a fight with an audience member, kill the person, and show everyone who's the boss
- 14 But then to make matters worse you reincarnate into a same time span life in bubbling Vomit Land
- 15 If you are in a alternative world's version of WW2
- 16 You give the ticket away at work
- 17 You change your name and start working on a broadway musical
- 18 You become a boxer
- 19 You form a heavy avant garde group
- 20 If you are now a sword wielding barbarian from a fantasy world
- 21 If you continue stealing
- 22 You get a job at the cryogenics lab
- 23 You are one of those Catholic boys
- 24 You are a driver in a Destruction Derby!
- 25 You are told not to ask for any more gigs
- 26 You start shooting movies for the drive in crowd
- 27 If you keep on talking to the penguin
- 28 You join the Harney County Orchestra
- 29 You try to hitchike home
- 30 Move to Harney County to be a musical number there
V. The Musical Paths
- 1 You end up playing guitar in the punk band VomitBot
- 2 Start up a new band then vowing to be cooler and vaster then the circle
- 3 You are only avant garde composer in Washington A C
- 4 You have a band
- 5 You come back as Pony Rose
- 6 You and Pickman quit Miskatonic university and go back to Santa Magic Village to join they're government funded Orchestra
- 7 Take all your drugs and cross on over
- 8 You buy a sax and start your own mutant jazz band
- 9 If you are transformed into a rock star of a alternative world
- 10 If you get into music
- 11 You go back home to form a band named The Sirens of Salt
- 12 If you attempt to join the band Black Circle
- 13 If you are on the shores of the newest American state, Washington A C.
- 14 You try to join the Engine Revvers
- 15 You meet this guy who could be your twin, and he plays keyboards!
- 16 So you never really make it to Wonderland
- 17 But then to make matters worse you reincarnate into a same time span life in bubbling Vomit Land
- 18 For you are Reino Nikola, yes the Reino Nikola
- 19 You take a hit of Mad 3
- 20 If you attack the police in a suicidal fury
- 21 If you give up on your research out of fear and move to infictive country to join a band
- 22 But your band breaks up
- 23 You join the Mackabee 6, a McFing6 cover band
- 24 You meet some travaling Musicians and you join their band
- 25 You are in the band Ignatz Wanders
- 26 You depart rapidly to start a stage show in a far off county
- 27 You form a band out of Verigone rejects
- 28 You are a musician
- 29 You form a band to pass time
- 30 So you never really make it to Wonderland
VI. Son of the Über Obscure Paths
- 1 You get a job as a lab assistant
- 2 First you encounter a MaMooska
- 3 You join the underground band FUCK
- 4 If you wish to become a Master of Bowlbetterology
- 5 If you are now a character in a H. P. Lovecraft book
- 6 If you end up in the land of the Lost!
- 7 Join the prison satan rock band Shaven Hoof
- 8 If you inheret money from your rich uncle
- 9 If you are transformed into a rock star of a alternative world
- 10 You spend every penny you made financing a mutant jazz outfit
- 11 If you start up an internet book store
- 12 Theres a zombie outbreak in Infictive County
- 13 You go to the old cabin your uncle owned
- 14 If you are sent to the far future
- 15 If you watch the TV between naps
- 16 If it's a alternatie reality version of REM Faire
- 17 The Reino Nikola Orchestra is formed
- 18 If you now gain mutant super powers in a comic bookish alternative reality
- 19 [[Big Brother is Watching You]]
- 20 If you become the Super Hero MegaYou
- 21 If you end up being the boss of a casino
- 22 You go on a space mission
- 23 If you encounter Bigfoot
- 24 Go to training to learn two words: Mui-Thai
- 25 You depart rapidly to start a stage show in a far off county
- 26 A insane killer stalks Alfredo Valley
- 27 Its a Holiday on the other side
- 28 You go on as a gonzo journalist
- 29 You head out to the mexican badlands searching for treasure
- 30 You go to Uglavaria
VII. The other last chart ever of paths
- 1 Endless Rooms
- 2 Next life one
- 3 The End
- 4 Infictive County in Prehistoric times
- 5 Next life two
- 6 He End
- 7 You get selected to be on a Maximum reality show
- 8 Nd
- 9 If you and Mcfing start a band
- 10 If you study to be a doctor with the OFTL money
- 11 He E
- 12 E End
- 13 End
- 14 Your Hollerin' Jack Johnson
- 15 The
- 16 He En
- 17 Next life three
- 18 If you are transported to the old west
- 19 Th
- 20 E En
- 21 The En
- 22 E E
- 23 The E
- 24 You are a quack, a total kook
- 25 You enlist in the anti squirrel termination team
- 26 HE EnD
- 27 Now its time for your court hearing sucka
- 28 THe EnD
- 29 He
- 30 En
VII. The next last chart ever of paths
- 1 ThE EnD
- 2 E end
- 3 You take up drinking as your occupation
- 4 You attend a Catholic Mass
- 5 THE end
- 6 You go to Unruh Manor
- 7 E
- 8 War of the holiday cults
- 9 TheEnd
- 10Become involved with a cult
- 11You begin to learn about the New World Order
- 12The end
- 13Blast off
- 14He end
- 15TheEn
- 16Your Tom Biscuit
- 17The ENd
Post Notes
This is a online version of a Pick Your Path to Adventure book. It is here for kicks, and to educate the new comer to the weird mythology of the Hyperwiki. Eris recommends that you follow one of the above paths till the path ends each day as a sort of a western Zen exorcise.
Equipment: Time, will, and maybe a nice six sided die, and a thirty sided die as well. There's a Dice Machine kicking around if you need one (or maybe a 1-30 random generator if more your thing). Heck, just use your mind to randomize, or carefully pick the places the story unfolds into.
